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Kelly Kelly Possibly Returning For Some Bizarre Reason

World Wrestling Entertainment :: Date: February 10th, 2020

Jesus Christ... I've just recieved some terrible news. Kelly "Roll-Up Pin" Kelly may be coming back to WWE.


That's right. The girl with a padlock on the back of her bra is going to grace us with her eternal "please don't realize that I'm regular looking" smile and ectasy-riddled theme music wants to return to the ring!

If you put out a "Best of Kelly Kelly" video, it would fit on a floppy disc because it would only be her bikini photoshoots.

If Kelly Kelly does return... fucking shit. What the fuck is she gonna do? Get carried through mediocre matches with WWE's women's division that already sucks? Sure, this current crop of girls are better than Stacy Keibler at wrestling but they're still fucking awful.

But maybe WWE just got confused, and when people said they wanted CM Punk back they had an aneurism and thought of this:


UghhHHHHHHH. Please don't make me sit through more Kelly Kelly matches. I will shoot myself.

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A dark humor webzine brutally mocking professional wrestling.