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WWE News - April 30th, 2020

World Wrestling Entertainment :: Date: April 30th, 2020

Braun Strowman has donated 1000 meals to hospital workers in Orlando, as part of a selfless act of caring for his fellow human... pffftttt. Hahahahaa. No. I'm just fucking with you. It was totally for the press.

In addition to that fun little blip, Curtis Axel has been fired from WWE as of this morning. We may have never fully realized the Genesis of McGillicutty, but now he can Megadrive his ass to the next TNA Genesis event.

On another note, apparently wrestling crowds might be returning in June... at least, in Florida. Which is actually crazy to think about. If WWE decides to stay in Florida to assure they have a live crowd during all this, that means they'll be running out of the same Florida building, every week, broadcasting in front of the same fans with a lot of former TNA wrestlers. The parallel writes itself.

I say, fuck it. Let's just rename Raw to Impact. It's not like Impact Wrestling existing matters anyway. We could totally just pretend WWE is TNA and it would make more sense than pretending Impact is TNA.

And before I blip off after this little update of stuff, head over to WNS to read a brief excerpt from a script where Hornswoggle was going to be murdered on TV by Vince McMahon. Yes, this is -after- the Chris Benoit thing.

That's this morning's wrestling news in a nutshell. So... I don't know. Crack it open and pour it on your face.

I don't have one of those cool news-exit lines. I'm not a podcaster. Podcasts suck.

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A dark humor webzine brutally mocking professional wrestling.