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AEW Dynamite (11/6/2019)

All Elite Wrestling :: Date: November 6th, 2019

We open with Trent vs. Pac, which is pretty cool to me because I was getting really burnt out on tag-team wrestling. Like, yeah. I get it. WWE doesn't value tag-teams. That doesn't mean your entire federation needs to consist of tag teams.

Cody Rhodes has an announcement that he's proud to be an entitled millennial and that Chris Jericho is a dick. Phenomenal.

During the illuminati Doritos commercial, Rey Mysterio and La Parka come out. Then SCU comes out. Then we get a big ass tag-team match. Because fuck me, I guess. And fuck everything I said.

They aired a hilarious video package making light of Jericho's age, how Jack Swagger doesn't talk, etc. It was hilarious. But fuck you. What am I supposed to do when something's already funny? I can't mock something if it's good. This is bullshit. They made all my jokes for me.

Tully Blanchard looks like he should always be eating a big bowl of oatmeal. He is one oatmeal looking ass motherfucker.

When Sammy Guevera comes out he aims his phone at himself and starts recording himself... and the video quality was fucking atrocious. How old is his phone? That shit was like 240p.

Seriously. Look at this.

I had sex while playing RuneScape once and I don't give a fuck about Sammy the Omegle Fapper.

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A dark humor webzine brutally mocking professional wrestling.